Chapter Six: Poems and writings inspired by my trip

Taken at the mall outside Jerusalem

Dream Child
16Nov10

Hopeless games take up my time
And sap my energy.
If I fell to the street tonight,
It's been fun hoping that
I may have found the one.
But you won't give it a chance.

You blame it on my duality and
I blame it on my lack to accept.
And I know that in the end
You'll be fine.
But I'm the one walking away
All scarred.

Make yourself real,
Come to life from the pages-
From the screen on which you live.
You have me, you know.
All you need is to ask.
I'm yours.


16Nov10

I'm always searching for that spinning light…that's not a proper description of it. When I was close to death in the hospital a year ago, one of the odd yet clear visions I had was a diamond-shaped object that was spinning rapidly. It was a brilliantly bright object in pitch blackness. As it spun, it seemed to throw off sparks, or smaller diamonds. I'll never forget it. My head hurt so badly; I pleaded for a coma to end it. And when I closed my eyes, here was this spinning object- so clear and beautiful.

When I close my eyes now, I often look for it again. I never see it. But once, a few weeks ago when I had a minor cold, I saw an object very much like it. But instead of a brilliant white object, it was multi-colored, still spinning and shooting off light in all directions. The vision didn't last as long as it did that time in the hospital. But it was beautiful and made me feel calm.



Khufu's Gift
5Dec10


I came half way around the world
And you were still there for me
Stone by stone and layer upon layer
And we are one
The desert is no more dry
The sun is no more high
And we are one
Though I never thought we could
Thousands of years have gone between
And they taunt me so
With unnecessary truths
Only those from without can ever know
You see me from your lofty spire
Forget all that we aspire to be
Tell me those secrets
Because I really want to know
The stars aren't so obscure
But you know all about that
The mysteries feel cold
So many ancient keys formed on a map
And we are not alone



Alabaster Dreams
5dec10

I had dreams of alabaster.
I had needs that had passed.
One for the boy who had come
And then went
One for the night to watch over me,
And for the day not to flee.
So there I was,
In a valley of kings.
Ready to dream,
In a valley of kings.
Willing to see
Alabaster dreams;
Broken in two.
A beacon to see
Everything else and
Everything in between.
This is the one here.
This is the on I'll keep.
To keep you company for eternity.



Entrance to Petra
5Dec10


These canyon walls can't pass for much;
But more riches for a passing idol or two.
And that'll do-
That'll do
Until the treasury stone falls
And we get rich from our dreams.

He lives in a cracked tomb,
But it's his family heirloom.
And the gravity checks us in,
Until they come to do us in;
Building on top of all we've accomplished

Divert the water and
Alter time,
For what we have here
Is a wonder for all to see.
If only we can keep the foundations free.

Here I go passing through again.
So many stone chips that fell,
Keeping time with the heavens;
Cracked open for all to see.
Keeping secret our passionate treat.



Old Skies of India
5Dec10

A star, they said.
A streak through the sky
And we'd be done.
Built a machine to save the race
And gunned it toward the heavens.
Vimanas and wheels spinning through time.
Six thousand years of asking,
What are we coming to?
Where did it all begin?
And where is home again?
Circle under triangle,
Those masters of flight.
An arrow to the stars.
We've never been far from home,
Just neighbors of the star…
That fell



Stones of Wadi Rum
5Dec10

Penguin at Wadi Rum


They love me
Call me from far away
Come to where the sands meet
The rock that towers high above
Speaks to me
Tells me secrets
And things
Going on and on
But I can't understand
For I don't speak its language
Try as I will
I may not be strong enough
I may not belong
And still I can hear its voice
As the sun sets on my dream
And the darkness corners the sound
Leaving me bound
In silence again
And it's only then that I realize
I'm the only one who ever heard them
Anyway



Anjuna Beach at Night
5Dec10

A line of lights into the darkness I see
Surely it's a shoreline, says he
But I'm assured there is no land there
Who can tell for sure in the darkened air?
I return when the light is new
For I need an answer, true
The temperature rising
A haze fills the sky
I see nothing as if darkness were nigh
How will I ever get my answer?
Who will swallow the question,
And fail to choke on its insignificance?
But that is the truth I've come to know
And it's the truth that makes me whole
So this is why
I bear this soul.



Sometimes
5Dec10

I wipe the sand from your feet
In sight of sacred cows
Who watch in blank curiosity.
Sometimes we suffer for the searching,
Just like they did so long ago.

I give a drink
When the heat gets to you
And lift you to the moon
Even when it's new
For that's what I'm told to do

A touch on the face
Tells that I still care.
We suffer and sometimes we bend,
And sometimes we come further
Than we wanted to

Oil on your skin-
Just lie right back and
You'll be fine in an hour.
The sweat will set you right;
Fall asleep and drift away

A smile from across the room,
A hand on my back.
We suffer and sometimes we bend.
Sometimes we come further
Than we wanted to



On my birthday:
My 43rd year has proven to be one of the most challenging of my life. I've seen death from closer than ever before. I've overcome hardships of finance and health and I've lost one of the dearest things in my life. I've traveled around the world. I look towards the rising sun in a new light. I look for a new way. I yearn to keep growing and changing; to learn; to see. The years hang on me with increasing weight. I move with a slower gait. But I move. I see. I learn. I grow. I yearn. I seek. That's all I can be. Happy Birthday to me!

On Mom's birthday:
I can't speak to the forces that came before. I can't speak to the chances and alignments that made it all happen. As far as I'm concerned, you were here for me; my creation, my development, my learning, my programming, my comfort and needs. So I speak to what I know and say thanks. Half way around the world- I've maybe picked up a thing or two. But your gift hasn't diminished. Your gift shines brighter than the sun. Today, the sun sets for me as it rises for you. You are the brightest gift in my universe for placing me here. And my gift for you is the appreciation of being here as a result of you. Happy birthday from India, Penguin



Blue Skin
7dec10

Blue skin
And plenty of arms to hold you.
Around again
In foreign tongues to scold you.
Nothing but praise
Piled on high.

Blind faith
And never asked why.
Temple of stones that grows so old;
Luster lost in elements of gold.
Yet still we come to see
All that you used to be;
Piled up in layers and layers
Like so many undone prayers.

So we dance this dance
Of apocalyptic trance,
And cast our eyes up high
To bathe in the mystic light,
Of the one with a knowing grin.
The one we know-
In blue skin


Her Birthday
7Dec10
Ra, Kelly, Sasha, Emma, Penguin and Tom at Dudhsagar Falls


Was it in the way she asked
Was it in the way she stumbled
Feeding her soul like a starving Indian monkey
She cried on her birthday
That was one night
Of many
It's not sad
I don't care

Was it in the way she smiled
Was it in the way she tickled
Filling her dreams under a milky waterfall
She cried on her birthday
That was one night
Of many
It's not sad
I don't care

Far from home feeling all alone
Surrounded by friends she'd just met
Put on your black hat
Put on your sari
Thinking of leaving Goa
Puts on her black hat
Puts on her sari
Thinking of her Cambridge sun

She cried on her birthday
That was one night
Of many
It's not sad
Think I might join her.




Jewel of Anjuna
7Dec10


His father left him his mother
And sisters.
It's not his fault he was first-born.
His father left him a better man,
And jitters.
So he's the jewel of Anjuna;
Only for a year or so.
Keeping alive a glorious tradition
In a strange land;
Got itself a lucky hand.
It's always good morning, sir,
And service shining so brightly.
He's the jewel of Anjuna.
Only for a year or so;
Keeping alive a glorious tradition.
It's a strange land-
Strong legs, arms and head;
Strong hands, back and man.
His mother's flower
Puts bread on the table;
Same thing again.
Willing and able,
To fetch himself back to Anjuna.
For a year or so;
Keeping alive a glorious tradition.
In a strange land.



Hatshepsut
7dec10


She said I'd go to hell.
So I asked her to join me.
And she just did
Just like that.
Climbing a pyramid to the sun,
Like crossing on the belly of god
Until we reach the end of the end
And can turn around in the sand,
Seeing no steps of where we'd been.
So we have nothing else to do
But go on
Together.
It's outrageous if you ask me.
Like a dream
Unraveling the details
As seen before,
In eyes so keen
On seeing the sanity
In the strange dream.



Some rules for India:
· When driving, you must be in a hurry. It is unacceptable to be a part of slow traffic. And pass with 2 cars, 3 cars across, if you must.
· Honking is your friend. Beep to say hello to that mosquito. Beep to let a pedestrian one half mile up the road know that you are approaching from behind. Because they surely won't hear the loud rickshaw motor!
· Toilet paper is an idea ahead of it's time. We'll give you some; but only because you insist. The rest of us will squat along the road or train tracks. And since it's something we all do, there is little to no modesty about it.
· Sacred cows aren't quite as sacred as the name suggests. We won't eat them, but we'll slap them to get them to move along and we'll nudge them with our rickshaws.
· We like decorations. We decorate our trucks and tractors. It keeps us busy when not tending to the fields. Or pooping in them.
· Selling food to tourists to feed monkeys must be done at least 500 feet from the sign saying that feeding the monkeys is forbidden. The punishment is having one's toilet paper taken away.
· The signs instructing people not to smoke doesn't apply to people, and if it did it wouldn't apply today…maybe tomorrow. We learned this from the Egyptians.
· Most Indians learn English in elementary school. The first phrase learned is, "Come look my shop." All Westerners have the same name, it's "Myfriend".
· When shopping at a market, you must low-ball the price you're willing to pay. And even if your initial price is less than half our asking price if we agree right away, you should have gone lower!